End of an Era

It’s official folks…my Rhode Island drivers license and license plates have been turned over. The bad news is Texas license plates are incredibly lame…straight up black and white…really? The good news is my drivers license picture has improved tremendously, in my opinion.

Goodbye QV-450 with a wave in the background...Hello CCS-2250. Lame.

Goodbye QV-450 with a wave in the background…Hello CCS-2250. Lame.

I wasn’t planning on switching everything over, but apparently, the police can pull you over and give you a fat ticket when you have an expired vehicle registration from another state. Apparently you have 30 days to register your car in Texas after moving here and 90 days to switch your drivers license. Who knew? Okay…I did know, but I’m an outlaw, a rebel, a bad-ass chick… and I wanted to keep my pretty license plates! Another kicker…I have to go to traffic school and pay $112. Six hours on a Saturday. Awesome. Not feeling so bad-ass anymore. Thank you, Officer Wilkes, for crushing my spirit.

Neighbors Be Crazy

Having lived in my apartment for just over a month, I have started to get to know a few of my neighbors. Most are really nice and funny and others are a little crazy. Here is a recap of some of my interactions thus far.

1. There is a dirt trail that snakes through my apartment complex that I usually follow on walks with Henry. I had started to get a little nervous because along the trail I noticed a dead bird one day and a dead squirrel on another. We have a pest guy that comes every last Thursday of the month so I thought maybe he was spraying something that was killing these animals and that could potentially hurt Henry. Well, a few days ago I found the real reason for the poor dead creatures…an old, murderin’ neighbor!

Every apartment has a little patio/balcony in the front or back of the place and the trail runs right past most of them. A few days ago I was out walking Henry on my lunch break when I noticed my neighbor sitting out on his patio. He has to be at least 70 years old. I’ve seen him out there before and he never really says much. If he ever does I usually can’t understand him so I just laugh and smile and tug on Henry to keep it movin’. That day I noticed my neighbor had binoculars in his lap. My first thought was that he was trying to look into other people’s apartments…old perv. My second thought was that he was bird watching. How cute…just an old, bird watchin’ fella. My second thought was closer to the truth than my first, except he’s not a cute, old fella, he’s a murderin’ old fella! Along with his binoculars my neighbor had a sling shot with him! That’s right. He’s been killing birds and squirrels with a sling shot! I had to admit, that’s a little bad ass, but mostly crazy!
Someone must have said something to him because I haven’t seen any more dead animals. He now has a metal chicken, which he moves around this big tree and uses as a target instead. Still very weird.

2. My upstairs neighbor is a doctor. Every Monday, Wednesday and Friday we all set our trash out on the curb to be picked up. For a doctor, he eats a ridiculous amount of Domino’s Pizza. I’m talking 2-3 empty boxes almost every trash day. Shouldn’t he know that’s not a healthy diet?

Really I’m just jealous that he gets to eat that much pizza. God I love pizza.

3. I recently met my mail man. He has a sweet 70’s mustache, a pony tail, and wears bandanna’s. He talked to me for 30 minutes about how he used to own basset hounds. I couldn’t come up with a polite way to say “Cool, but can you please just give me my mail already?” He did give Henry a dog biscuit before leaving though, so that was nice.

4. Apparently there are only old people and med students/doctors that live in my apartment complex. And the occasional Fort Hood Army person. One day, when I was out walking Henry again, one old lady stopped to tell me that my shoes were fabulous and that “she used to be a looker too.” I’ll take that as a compliment? She proceeded to tell me all about how she used to live in a mansion and that she had beautiful clothes and cars and jewelry. Her family told her they were selling it and that she either needed to move to a small apartment or an assisted living home. She got the biggest 3 bedroom apartment they have at Chapel Creek just to annoy her family. I love her a little bit.

5. This other old lady, the mother of one of my neighbors, was sitting in her car one morning. She opened her door as Henry and I walked by and said “Miss, your dog is just absolutely lovely.” Old people are seriously the cutest (except for the animal killin’ old man). She asked if she could pet Henry. He proceeded to try and climb into her lap and eat her Jack in the Box breakfast sandwich. My neighbor said I probably made her day since she loves dogs so much.

I think instead of working every day, I am just going to walk around with Henry and visit old people. Maybe I should stop calling them old people first?

I was telling my boss some of these stories the other day. His only response was that maybe I should try to meet people my own age and have more of a life. Old people, people watching doesn’t sound like a life to you? Weird.

I Have An Adorable Father…and a stupid nickname

So my childhood nickname is Lina Doodles. Super embarrassing. Over the years, my family members and close friends have either called me Lina, Doodles, or just Doods. Except for my sister, Erin, who is a little more creative then most. She turned Lina Doodles into Lish, Ish Lish, or Ishy poo. Thanks a lot Erin. We did call her Erg or Ergamister as a kid so I guess I deserve it. On that note- I also started calling my other sister, Megan, Moodle when she calls me Doodle. That has also turned into Meggie Moo. And I didn’t like my brother Lawrence’s name when I was a kid so I called him Pete for most of his young life. His middle name is Patrick. I guess all around we are a family of terrible nicknames.

The nickname was not okay in Jr High, but I’m pretty okay with it now. Especially when my father does adorable things like this…

" Oodles of Doodles... Inspiring Ideas to Get You Drawing and Creating"

” Oodles of Doodles… Inspiring Ideas to Get You Drawing and Creating”

He saw this in a store and decided to send it to me because the title “Oodles of Doodles” made him laugh. My mom added the card– the message was really sweet, but Dad is currently winning in the awesome parent department (sorry mom).

So it’s decided. I have the best father and a pretty stupid nickname.

Armadillo BFF

Since moving to Texas, people ask me all the time what I thought it was going to be like here and if any of that was true. Here is a list of what I thought about Texas before moving here and how accurate those thoughts were:

1. Everyone drives a truck – Pretty accurate.

2. People wear cowboy hats – Also pretty accurate.

3. Everyone drinks an excess amount of beer – Very true.

4. People are super sweet – 100% true.

5. There are cows everywhere – True and I love it.

6. They are obsessed with High School Football…I was a big fan of Friday Night Lights – This is ridiculously true and I absolutely can’t wait for Football season.

Seriously...this is Temple High School's Football Stadium....It seats 12,000 fans.

Seriously…this is Temple High School’s Football Stadium….It seats 12,000 fans.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Outside the stadium...seriously this is real life

Outside the stadium…seriously this is real life

7. They have fire ants…my mom scared the crap out of me with this one – They do, but I have yet to have a problem with them (knock on wood).

8. Ditto for snakes and scorpions- I have yet to encounter them and pray I never do.

9. They love guns- scarily true

 

10. They are not super concerned with healthy eating or being environmentally conscious.  – Unfortunately that’s pretty true. Not that everyone eats badly and hates the earth or anything, but my office and apartment building, and most of Texas it seems, does not recycle. This morning for breakfast a client brought in something called Kolache’s that was essentially a hot dog wrapped in a biscuit with melted cheese on it. For Breakfast. I passed on that one.

11. There are armadillo’s roaming the streets- I was praying this one was true, but had yet to see one UNTIL YESTERDAY! Dreams do come true kids. I had met an armadillo once before, but that was at the zoo so it doesn’t really count. I was real excited though…

Why you curled up into your shell fool...Don't you know we are BBFs??

Why you curled up into your shell fool…Don’t you know we are BBFs??

 

Even more excited than my nephew...he was 4...I was 20.  Why did that sucker uncurl for him?? Not cool man.

Even more excited than my nephew…he was 4…I was 20.
Why did that sucker uncurl for him?? Not cool man.

I was driving so I couldn’t get a picture of my new armadillo friend, although I did seriously consider pulling over to do it. For your reading pleasure, I Googled some sweet armadillo images. This one was my favorite. It sums up two Texas stereotypes all in one beautiful picture.

Armadillo-Beverage-Holder

Armadillos and beer…Now that is Texas

So basically everything you think about Texas is true. It is a very strange place, but a really fun place. I mean who doesn’t want to wear a cowboy hat, drink beer, and watch football with some cows and armadillos? I’d like to see some recycling and healthy food options and I could live without the guns, but I’ll take what I can get. I mean it’s the south…you have to give them a little more time to get there.